Every day is a good day to celebrate plus-size non-binary people. Let’s uplift these important voices and let them share their stories in their own words. Add them to your feed to queer up your day and support the important and diverse work they are all doing.
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Hunty the Lion
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“Secondly, I literally survived the war between the world and my gender. I’m still here after the predatory behaviors of men who used my body as sanctuary and burial ground. I’m still existing beyond the limitation of the antiblack imagination. I’m still Black, still fat, still queer, still nonbinary, still a bad fucking bitch, still soft like fire and viciously unhumble. This is my theme park, what should I scream for? Ya girl is really in her bag! I am so proud of how gentle I am with myself through all that I’ve created and survived. I am so grounded and so clear about what affirmation and safety looks like for me! I’m grateful for the lessons learned and practice I put in.” Hunter of Hunty the Lion
Deej Nutz Burlesque
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“I’ve only identified as non-binary for about 5 years, but looking back at my childhood, I was always non-binary. I’m the middle child and I have 2 sisters. I never did the girly things my parents expected. I preferred baggie clothes that didn’t show the curves I didn’t yet appreciate. There were few skirts and dresses that I liked, but quickly grew out of. We didn’t have the vocabulary and the representation of different gender identities. I only knew of trans men and women and knew that neither of them really fit me.
It’s hard to tell people that they’re wrong when they say you’re a girl/woman if you don’t have something to replace it with (at least that’s how it was with my bio fam.) I’m getting better at listening to myself, honoring myself and taking care of myself now that I have a better idea of who I am. I am taking steps to live authentically me.” Deej of Deej Nutz Burlesque
Comfy Fat Travels
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“Hi friends! Just wanted to give you an intro since I haven’t done that in a while. My name is J and Im a trans nonbinary person. I use they/them pronouns. I exist outside of the binary system of gender that our culture has created. Im not a man. Im not a woman. Im a person. I have all kinds of qualities that we typically deem “masculine” and “feminine.” Basically, when it comes to my gender, just be cool with the fact that I don’t belong in a box??” – J of Comfy Fat Travels
“Gender feels are strange. I never rule out how I’m going to feel on any given day, whether more masculine or feminine. My gender presentation is very “in the moment”, and right now, I’m feeling very in touch with my femme side.
Regardless of how I present at any time, I am still non-binary. I still use they/them pronouns. I am still neither a boy or a girl. Please remember that being non-binary does not automatically equate to thin, white, masculine-presenting, or being afab (assigned female at birth). Remember these, and your enby friends & loved ones will thank you!” – Criptyd Queer of Effyalece
The Themme Fatale
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“Well, I’m 35 parent of 1 human and 2 fur babies. I began fully identifying as non-binary in 2017/2018. I’m a polyamorous pansexual who enjoys living outside of the box. To me, non-binary doesn’t have a specific look. I always thought it meant you had to be androgynous. However, as I’ve grown into my self, I’ve learned it is and looks so many ways” – Nakia of The Themme Fatale
Mermaid Queen Jude
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“I am queer. My gender is queer. My sexuality is queer. The way I move through the world is queer. I am often read as a woman – I’m not. I can sometimes be read as straight – I’m not.
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My hold on my gender is as fleeting and changes as often as what I want to eat does. But for right now – I still use she/her & they/them pronouns. Presenting femme still feel good for me. Pursuing people who aren’t cis men still feels good for me.
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And maybe I’ll never truly know what to label my gender, I just know that sometimes im completely fine and other times someone calls me lady or girl or woman and I want to crawl out of my skin. It’s confusing.” – Jude of Mermaid Queen Jude
deadsetonlyf
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“Today someone I’d called a friend since I was 17 told me “all this nonbinary shit boils my piss” and he is allowed to be angry about it and it does effect him because it doesn’t make sense. Imagine being angry at something because you have no idea what it means and won’t take 10 minutes to have a quick Google and learn it’s not “new shit”. Don’t be an ignorant bigot, and if a friend calls you out on your behaviour towards something you don’t understand hear them out instead of belittling them.” – Ben of deadsetonlyf
Chair Breaker
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“all of these norms of masculinity are based in white supremacist idealizations of the body, but they remain deracialized in their imagining even when they are specifically cited as negatively impacting men of color across racial lines. if yr queerness uncritically idealizes these norms of masculinity—esp thru eroticizing them—yr queerness is white supremacy.” – Caleb of Chair Breaker
Suma Jane Dark
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“I don’t talk about this too much on here because it’s hard for me to articulate, but did y’all know I’m a nonbinary femme? ✨ What the heck does that even mean? Welll, it means my pronouns are “they/them”, I don’t really find myself within the bounds of binary gender, and prefer to just think of my gender as “Suma”. As for being a femme, femme for me is about enjoying femininity for myself first and foremost, and secondly for the validation/appreciation of other femmes. I don’t let my fashion choices, love life, self expression, or anything else be steered by anything other than myself- and least of all by patriarchal beauty standards, outdated ideas of gender, etc. Happy to be me, happy to be queer, and happy to not care too much about explaining it, because who could ever *really* explain their own heart anyway? ?” – Suma of Suma Jane Dark
Soft Body Tender Mind
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“#NationalComingOutDay, in list form, with handy definitions
non-binary (feel neither male nor female gendered, considered by many to be a variation of trans [white stripe of trans pride flag
vagina (I have a vagina
pansexual (I am attracted to and would potentially bang all iterations of humanity
extremely fat (I am very large
probably high functioning autism spectrum disorder (my brain processes differently than average brains
depression (I feel sad and isolated a lot –investigating PTSD symptoms (most people are unsupportive or actively hostile to aspects of my personhood and I have limited access to basics you may enjoy
momparent (two kids, woman-passing, societally accepted
wifespouse (husband, woman-passing, societally accepted
not trendy (most of these things do not make my life easier; I do not enjoy being treated poorly and relationships suffering because of being honest about these things
queer (all of the above” – Kelly of Kelly Lenza Photography
The Fat Posi Punk
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“When I was young and first getting into fashion one of the earliest things I learned was that in order to be even remotely respected, fat girls had to be hyper feminine all the time. They have to prove to the world that they “care about their appearance” by playing into these gender norms to an extreme amount. As I got older and started to realize that I was not a girl, I panicked. I thought there was no place for someone like me in the fashion world. I wish I could go back and tell younger me that it’s okay to not be a girl, it’s okay to feel uncomfortable with the way the world tries to force femininity onto you, and that there IS a place for people like you in fashion. The sense of community and acceptance I have now is more than I ever dreamed and I’m so thankful. I am a proud nonbinary person, and I will never again apologize for who I am ” – Lilly of The Fat Posi Punk
Maggie McGill
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“Hi folks ?? This is a post about being ✨non-binary✨
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I describe myself as quietly non-binary because not many people outside of the internet know this about me! I still use she/her pronouns in addition to they/them and my style has touches of femme. And now that my undercut has grown, I pass as straight and cis automatically. But even in makeup and dresses, I’m still non-binary! How fun!” Maggie of Maggie McGill
Want to be an ally? Sit down and uplift marginalized peoples’ voices and learn before you speak. Take criticism to heart and change your behavior rather than explain all the reasons you aren’t wrong. Have a question or don’t understand something? Google is a great resource. If you require the labor of a non-binary person PAY THEM!
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Feature image of Deej Nutz Burlesque by Cass Phanord.
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